My baby sister, you may know, has late stage ovarian cancer. That is a bad cancer to have...She is my only sister and we're close. She lives 4 hours south of me in Eugene. We email a lot, but don't talk all that often because I'm on Verizon and she's on something else so it costs us minutes to talk unless we wait till after 9:00, but by then she's often tired. And weekends are hectic for both of us.
Today, I wanted to talk to her, so I made a mental note to try to remember to call her right at 9:00.
Then I got up from my computer and was walking down the hall to my bedroom thinking about finding my slippers when it struck me. I am not calling my only sister during the day, my kid sister that I will lose within the next half dozen years...because I am saving my minutes.
My minutes.
We go through life in half a daze of habit and unexamined behavior most of the time, don't we?
In a few years, how many minutes would I be willing to "un-save" to talk to my sister?
5 comments:
I just happened to stumble across your blog. I read your most recent post and I just had to respond - hope you don't mind.
My mom recently lost her sister, her only sibling, to cancer (non-Hodgkin's lymphoma).
Call your sister. Call her whenever you feel like it. Don't worry about those minutes. You'll never regret it :-)
Yes, Yes and Yes.
I most certainly will...
And thank you for your comment, tracyellen.
It's so understandable - we really are basically creatures of habit.
Going back before cells, my mother only called relatives on Christmas. She wrote loooong letters to them throughout the year, but calling them was out of the question - decades of the mantra "long distance calls are too expensive".
She had never considered that the cost of calls had changed or made a comparison, like a movie ticket equaled x-number of calls. She was a very smart cookie, but it was simply ingrained.
Don't feel guilty for a minute. "Saving minutes" wasn't a conscious decision, "spending minutes" with your sister is!!
Holly
There is abundance in God's kingdom. His children are heirs, and have access to all they need... God will supply all your needs according to his riches in glory. God's supply is endless. When it matters to you, it matters to him. So ask your Abba Father for the minutes you need with your sister and then take them. Life is short. There is no cell phone service in heaven so if you want to hear your sister's voice, call now. My Mom and Dad died... 46 and 50... and I would use ALL my mintues if I could speak to them. Life's most precious gift is family. Another suggestion... can you go there and create a memory with her? Porch sitting with my sister is my very favorite thing... perhaps you two would enjoy that too. We made each other a promise that we would spend at least one week together every year...many years we spend more. And those are my favorite times on earth. Just an idea.
I want to share something with you Ann. The best friend I ever had died on June 26th of this year. She was only 44 yrs old. I hate talking on the phone. But with her it was never a problem. Not a day passed without talking to her. Sometimes we would talk all night or day. We were always blessed with a way to talk for free. A week before she died she did something that made me feel she had taking advantage of our friendship. This resulted in me not answering any of her calls for a week. I needed to cool off before I spoke to her. We had many times where we would get angry with one another but it was always short lived. Just as this time was going to be. Harsh words can cut right through a person so I usually back away. It took me a week to call her. I called her for three days straight. 10 or 20 times each day to let her know that I was ready to talk. I begged and pleaded with her to talk to me. Told her how sorry I was for not answering her calls. I truly thought she was paying me back for not answering her calls. I knew in my heart I deserved it. So, I just kept calling. I knew she would eventually pick it up and talk to me. Our friendship was to the end and we both knew there was nothing that could destroy it. Our friendship was rock solid. It still makes me physically ill to say this, but I want to share it with you. The three days that I left a multitude of messages, she was lying dead in her living room. I don't think she ever heard any of my messages. I have no way of putting into words what I felt the day her Mother called me to tell me that she had been found dead. She went into Glory and left me here with a load of guilt so heavy that I can't even openly speak aloud what I am typing to you now. I have asked the Lord to forgive me, and I know He has. Just wish I could talk to my friend one more time. Ann my friend was in the early stages of Lupus. I knew Lupus would eventually take her life. But I had no idea she would just drop dead before she became real sick. Ann trust me when I say, if you don't draw closer to her now, you may not get that chance later. You do not want to feel what I feel right now. Please call her Ann, even if it's just to say "I had you on my mind and just wanted to say I love you!" If it were you who was dying, what would you want to hear your loved ones saying to you? Sometimes we have to put ourselves in there position before we can know what it is that we need to be doing for them. There's no going back. Maybe I have shared too much with you and I'm not sure right now if all this is for you or for me. But, whatever the reason I felt compelled to write this to you. I am sure the Lord will make it all clear to us one day. I will be praying for you and your sister.
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