It's possible I am no longer sane.
With only 7 and a half hours to go before my taxi comes to whisk me off to the airport, I decide I want to clean off my desk a little before I go.
On my desk is a mid-sized box from Amazon.com. I am always ordering books, then forgetting what I've ordered, and sometimes the boxes just sort of sit around for a while before I get around to opening them....
I decide to open the box...just in case there's a really juicy book in there that would be perfect for the cruise. I slit the tape and pull open the flaps and pause. I see a beautiful white box nestled inside. This is no book. The box says "Omega". My heart beats a little faster and my brow furrows a bit in confusion.
I pull out the white box and lift it's elegant lid, and inside is a most gorgeous cream-colored box tied with a satin red bow. What the heck is going on? Do I have a secret admirer?
I pull the smaller box out of the larger box and open it's hinged lid...and gasp. Gasp, I'm telling you.
I gasp.
Inside is an Omega diamond-studded woman's watch. A $2000 woman's watch. (I only know this because I just now looked online.) I know I do not have a secret admirer who would send me a $2000 watch. No one does.
I scrounge around the shipping box for a clue - there are authentication cards...but no personal notes or messages....Then I see the packing slip! Surely that will solve the mystery...
It sheds no light whatsoever. None. Zero. It only makes me doubt my sanity.
Under Billing Address is a woman's name I do not recognize from a city I've never been to. Under Shipping Address it says "Ann Kullbert" and my correct shipping address.
I do not understand. I can't understand. There's nothing here to help me grasp the meaning of this.
When did I slip over the edge???? I always thought it would happen more gradually, you know?
In all seriousness, though...if anyone has any idea what this is all about, or any suggestions as to what I should do, please let me know. Obviously I can't keep a $2000 watch from someone I do not know.
Meanwhile, I don't have a juicy book for the cruise....
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1 comment:
Well snatch me crosseyed and pull my drawers inside out! So that's where cousin Gussy Lou Butterbutt's glittrin watch went!!! Ya see, I was sittin over in da swang listen to an old crow whistlin "Way Down Apon the Swoonee River" the other day when beejeebertys I gots a new ideer! (At my age, new ideers don't happen less I be walking under da coconut tree and one falls off and knonks me on the noggin.)
Anyway, I thunk, I orta send Gussy one of Aunt Pooter Scooter's old glittrin watches that I gots when Aunt Pooter went in da ground! Sniff Sniff. Now mindja, I had my Ann Kelperhelper art pencil order sittin right thare on da same stretch of desk where I wasa writen Gussy about aunt Pooters glittrin watch. Never thunk I would getem mixed up and all.
But, I knows I can count on you Miss Annie to fetch it on over to cousin Gussy seeing as how I got it all mixed up and all. I have put her livin place below fer you to send it to. Thank ya Miss Annie fer straitin this all out for me. I knows I could always count on you. Your just as sweet as a little fuzzy ball of yeller kwilt yarn!
Gussy Lou's living place: <---See that Miss Annie, I lernt that when I went to 3rd grade. Always use them too little periods stacked on top of each other when yer wantin someone to see sumpthin pordant.
Gussy Lou Butterbutt (Don't ferget this here extree T on Gussy's butt so's the postman will know its her.)
8533601944633 Tinkertootin and Toodlin Trail,
Partment 400004 B
Waterhole, Kintuckety
(my spellin aint too good Miss Annie but I knows you know where Gussy is holdin up.)
Love and Bengay Rubs,
Edna Mae Picklepuss
PS...Harvey Hollar Snatratty says hello too ya.
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