tag...I'm it!

So I hear I have been tagged...and now I am to reveal 7 deep, dark secrets that most people don't know about me. Man....this is tough, because I'm not one to keep much to myself, as you may have already noticed! But I'll give it a shot...

1. I only get dressed when I have to. No....I am not nude right now! But I am in my "work uniform" - black velveteen nightgown, beige fleece robe and warm suede slippers. (sigh...May temps in Seattle are akin to March's most everywhere else...)

2. One summer, I wired an old cow skull found in the southern Utah desert to the front grill of my car, then my daughter Katie and I (she was around 10 at the time) decorated the entire car with our hand prints dipped from a whole rainbow of tempera paints. We had semi trucks blowing their horns for us whenever we were on the freeway. Katie and I both had a blast with the attention! Eventually, it rained and washed all our fun away. (Meanwhile, my parent's wondered where they'd gone wrong...I'm guessing it was all somehow intricately tied to that aforementioned diet, don'tcha think?)

3. I sleep so impossibly soundly that I probably should have been reported to Child Protective Services at some point. When my kids were newborns, I would butt the cradle right up against my side of the bed so their heads were fewer than 5 inches from mine. But it didn't matter...I slept and slept and slept right through their cries, anyway. Poor babies...by the time I would finally wake up, it was always painfully clear that they'd been attempting to get my attention for quite. some. time.

4. I've had every utility turned off...most of them several times. There were eleven leeeeeean years post-divorce, until my first book was published. One time, I had acquaintances over to the house and when I used the bathroom, I discovered my water had been turned off. I'll never forget my horror as I realized I was going to have to get them out of the house RIGHT NOW before they needed to use the bathroom!!!

5. I don't watch TV. (Well, I mean, except for Survivor, Amazing Race, American Idol, Project Runway, The Apprentice, Dancing with the Stars and the news....)

6. In my 50 years, I've been in love with or married: a white man, a Japanese man, a black man 14 inches taller than me, and a Pakistani man 19 years my junior. Turns out none of those were really my type. Major problem - I'm fast running out of types!

7. In my opinion, toast is the perfect food. White toast....and for the following reasons:

• It's cheap.
• It's warm.
• It's quick.
• It's sweet - cinnamon, jam, honey
• It's savory - cheese, peanut butter, spaghetti sauce
• It's crunchy.
• It's buttery.
• It just smells heavenly....

I even have a fond childhood memory about toast. We grew up in Japan (Dad was a Lutheran missionary there for 10 years) and we had a housemaid, Hayano-san. She was like our grandma. I loved her inside and out. One day, when I was around 5, she took me with her on a visit to a friend of hers - a rare, rare privilege. I remember sitting on the tatami floor close to the warm, charcoal hibachi as the two women talked. A ceramic hibachi in the middle of the "main" room of the house was the only source of heat for Japanese homes back then. Soon, Hayano-san's friend asked if I wanted toast. I should first say that although we grew up in a small, rural town about 2 hours outside Tokyo, and although we were the only foreigners in the town (in fact, we were the only family in town with a car - an old military Jeep) and although all our friends were Japanese.....we actually lived in a western style home with hardwood floors, an oven & fridge, a sofa and beds and all the usual western stuff. In other words, toast was made in a toaster at our house.

But Hayano-san's friend put two, thick white, square pieces of bread (Japanese bread loaves are square!) on the small metal grill that rested across the top of the hibachi. I watched, fascinated, as she eventually turned the bread with chopsticks and I saw beautiful golden brown grill lines gracing the toast tops. After another minute, she used her chopsticks again to remove the newly made toast onto a plate, then buttered them and handed them to me. I literally remember all of this better than I remember this morning's breakfast. I remember the warmth of the hibachi, the heavenly smell wafting from the grill, the chopsticks turning the slices, how special and grownup I felt being on an outing with Hayano-san, and the perfect crunch of that perfect toast. Oishikatta, wa! (Delicious!)

See? Can't really blame me for having a warm spot in my heart for toast, can you, now?!

Done! That wasn't so bad. But now I'm supposed to tag 7 more????????????? How am I going to do that? Help!